MARS BARRED | Maybe Hollywood and Mars used to date, and Hollywood cared deeply for Mars and was all like: “I love you, baby,” but then Hollywood came home from work early one afternoon and walked in on Mars doin’ it with an asteroid belt or whatever. That’s the only sensible explanation as to why Hollywood seems hellbent on destroying Mars’ reputation by using it as the setting for a bunch of stupid movies: Total Recall, RocketMan, Mission to Mars, Red Planet, Ghosts of Mars, Doom, and now JOHN CARTER, a baffling chunk of sci-fi nonsense with a script that’s all proper nouns and exclamation points. On this giggle-heavy episode of Scorncast, Jasper and very special guest Karim speak in silly voices, ponder the pitfalls of adapting antiquated literature, and try not to confuse their Tharks with their Therns and their Sab Thans with their Tars Tarkases. Spoiler alert: It doesn’t go so well. Click the Scorncast banner below to listen!
■■■ Showing in 3D and 2D. Rating: PG-13. Running time: 132 minutes.
Scorncast #42: Dejah Scornis (30:35)
original music by Bug